Pulling myself together

Sort of.

I shouldn't even be awake. It's Ramadan, you know, so I'll have to wake up in about four hours to eat breakfast and whatnot...

I'm not going to talk about Ramadan. I'm disappointed with myself with that. What I meant to talk about was...well, I'm not exactly sure. I'm disappointed with myself, also, for letting this blog go down the drain. I abuse my notebooks enough with my angst and drama. Must I bring my baggage into the internet world as well?
But the truth is this:

I have nothing to talk about.

That's just it in a nutshell. It's not that I don't want to talk about things, but my life is simply not interesting. And I know this, at least a little bit, because I've read enough blogs to bleed my eyes over and yes, I do have a very drab and...simply not interesting life. Even if I had a camera, I don't know what I'd take pictures of. It's not like I see things that are worth taking pictures of very often and I don't have enough clothes to take outfit pictures...but perhaps that's just my cynical, pessimistic side talking.
The Babybat Rants aren't so much about a Babybat at the moment, are they...
And alright, I won't talk about my life. At the very moment, I simply don't have the focus to talk about things on my mind, as strange as that sounds. I'd share so much on this blog...secrets I'm willing to part to anyone willing to listen...aspirations...dreams...so many dreams...and the impossible because they are impossible...but the moment I go to a blank entry, I lose all will to type. I draw a blank in my mind. I hate it. I don't understand it. Is it me? What am I doing wrong?

I started taking medication last week. It's suppose to help me focus and feel better about myself. I know medication does not help everything...but I'm desperate. Very, so very desperate. My pessimistic self believes even that will not work. How can I try to change when no one else...

Right. Venting in depressed-mode once again...

So. I'm going to shut up, now, and leave you all be. Maybe the next time I type something it'll be worth...wasting time over...